Everyone's Gay For Miranda Priestly
by XVnot15
Summary: It does exactly what it says in the Title.


**Everyone's Gay for Miranda Priestly**

_Disclaimer: Nothing is mine; I make no money from my scribbles. Go on and sue me if you must, I'll enjoy reading femslash out loud in court. No really I would!_

_A/N 1: Inspired by Muffinpines amazing cartoon, check out her Tumblr_

_A/N 2: Also done as a gift in honour of my 3D squeeze meet up last month with Stormashke and her Andy. Heh_

Andy paused at the mirror to check her clothes were perfect and double check her makeup. Looking at the unfamiliar image in the mirror she rolled her eyes at herself thinking how ridiculously quickly these little trips to the bathroom as soon as she arrived at work to double check her appearance had become a habit.

"Seriously Sachs, it's only been three weeks." She muttered before touching up her lipstick, and heading quickly out the door her mind still musing over memories of her makeover.

Only 21 days since she'd begged for Nigel's help and put herself into his hands. The transformation had been embarrassingly comprehensive and detailed. She had expected the change in clothes and accessories and shoes, the visible grooming changes, haircut and styling, eyebrow shaping, makeup tutorials etc. seemed logical and she hadn't balked at them but when the instructions about bikini lines and booking a Brazilian wax came up Nigel had to essentially frog march her to the beauty salon.

Later as he set Andy up with a week's worth of outfits from the closet he gave her a final once over and pronounced his work was done. He did qualify that with the disclaimer that he took no responsibility for any injury the clumsy woman might have as she learned to walk and, being Miranda's assistant, run, in four to five inch heels.

"Just do what you've been doing since day one Six." Nigel said as he stacked the bags and boxes with her outfits on the desk beside them.

"What have I been doing since day one?" The brunette asked while admiring herself in the mirror Nigel kept hidden behind a cupboard door.

"Just keep your eyes glued to Miranda's ass and mimic that sweet flowing roll she does and you'll be just fine." He smirked and then outright laughed when he saw Andy's face go from pink to nearly purple as she spluttered out denials of varying shades and intent. Finally relenting a little he got her calmed down before giving his final shot and flustering poor Andy all over again.

"Oh please Six there's no need to go all deep Mid-West on us, you have to know and really should embrace the simple fact that _'we are ALL gay for Miranda Priestly.'_ Say it with me now... 'I'm gay for Miranda Priestly.'"

"Uh Nigel you're a gay man how can you be gay for a woman?"

"You be gay your way Honey and I'll be gay mine, but it's a fact, we're still all gay for Miranda Priestly. Live it, breathe it, love it Baby."

Andy shot him a quelling look but given her still very red cheeks, it was less than effective in dampening his continued chortling. Sighing she grabbed up her clothes and stomped out of the office muttering under her breath. "You may be gay for Miranda, but I'm not gay for my boss." She repeated it over again and Nigel gave up the ghost allowing his raucous laughter to follow her down the corridor.

Andy wasn't sure if it was Nigel's teasing, or the fact she was so much more focused on looks and fashion in general now, but ever since her make-over she had found herself fixated even more than usual on her gorgeous boss. She greedily took every opportunity to stare at the beautiful woman whenever remotely possible. And those perusals were long and most comprehensive taking in the elegant shape of toned legs from prada pumps up to the luscious curve of hips, on past the trim waistline and upward to the mouth drying glory of her creamy white décolletage and usually ending with the pink quirk of tempting lips. Andy would only dare look higher when she could be certain Miranda's attention was otherwise engaged and she wouldn't accidently draw the woman's gaze to her own features which she knew would give entirely too much away. That's not to say she didn't look for those moments when she could look without getting caught looking, in fact she thought she might be getting whiplash from the weird positions she kept sitting in at her desk so that she would have a better view into Miranda's office.

Despite these obvious clues, not to mention the ridiculous number of Miranda headlining day dreams and more embarrassingly the telling nightly wet-dreams, Andy adamantly kept up her denial of any attraction to the Dragon Lady. She had taken a leaf out of Emily's book and started her own sotto voce mantra which she used several times a day in an attempt to keep herself focused on the job and not her reactions to Miranda's mere presence.

Too busy paying attention to Miranda's whereabouts, Andy's mantra, _'I am not gay for Miranda Priestly,'_ slipped out several times in the hearing of Emily and Nigel and possibly a few of the clackers. When Emily heard she merely rolled her eyes and snorted the same reply, 'Keep swimming de Nile Andrea.' When Nigel heard her he'd chuckle and re-iterate his assertion emphasising the word _ALL_ at the same time as pointing at Andy. Occasionally he'd say it in another language snarking that perhaps then Andy would understand and accept her fate. Once he even alluded to Andy's favourite novel and said, "To put it in your language Six. It is a truth universally acknowledged that everyone is gay for Miranda Priestly." That crack had earned him an extended tongue and a growl of displeasure.

If Andy had hoped this new obsession would fade over time she ended up sorely disappointed as it seemed only to grow each day seeing her use her mantra more and more. Today had seen her trot it out almost continuously in desperate reaction to Miranda's incredibly hot ensemble of Bill Blass slacks, white nearly button-less blouse, red belt and fitted brocade jacket. Just one look and Andy's thighs clenched and her mouth went dry. Even when Miranda had left her office for a meeting with Irv, Andy continued to day dream about Miranda in that outfit. Nearly 10 minutes after her boss's departure she was still sitting with glazed over eyes muttering, "I am NOT gay for Miranda Priestly. I am NOT gay for Miranda Priestly…"

The sudden and unexpected warmth of a body leaning over her shoulder from behind her chair and the ghost of warm breath flowing over her ear jerked Andy out of her trance only to plummet her into a near paroxysm of embarrassment when she heard Miranda's dulcet voice whisper.

"Don't be ridiculous Andrea, absolutely everyone is a little gay for me. Hell even I'm a little gay for me"

Miranda reached around the stunned woman and grabbed the expense report she'd forgotten to take with her earlier. Smirking she took in the near purple shade of her beautifully flustered second Assistant before patting her on the shoulder and turning to leave once more.

"Please breathe Andrea; if you pass out I might have to give you mouth to mouth to resuscitate you." She grinned evilly over her shoulder before adding a parting shot. "Or Emily will do it." With that parting shot she sauntered down the corridor leaving Andy to sputter and stammer over her mantra as she tried to calm herself down.

Luckily for the discombobulated brunette, Miranda was due to be away from the office for the rest of the day which allowed Andy to regain some kind of equilibrium. Eventually after a fair amount of soul searching and finally accepting the truth she simply couldn't deny, Andy decided to go for broke and own her feelings. When Emily returned to the office and happened to overhear Andy muttering happily to herself while she picked up some paperwork from the printer the red-head snorted so badly she nearly choked. Not a surprising reaction given that her co-worker was now quite cheerily chanting a new mantra….

"I am definitely gay for Miranda Priestly."

What neither women, nor Nigel for that matter would ever have guessed was that their toaster-oven champion of a boss was busily muttering her own mantra in the back of the town car as she drove to her next meeting.

"I may be a little gay for myself, but I'm a lot gay for Andrea Sachs."


End file.
